Some Jokes

Marriages are made in heaven
then what are made in Hell?
Ans : the days after marriage
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During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom is made to sit on the horse ?
He is given his last chance to run away.
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I wrote your name on the sand ............ .
it got washed away,
I wrote your name in air......... ......... ........
it got blown away,
So i wrote your name in my heart....... ......
I got a HEART ATTACK
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LOVE is like a CIGAR
It starts with a fire..... continues with smoke.....and ends in ashes...
But don't worry - we are chain smokers
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your smile can be compared to a flower
your voice can be compared to a cuckoo
your innocence to a child
but in stupidity
you have no comparison
you r the best
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True love is like a pillow
you can hug when you r in trouble
you can cry on when you are in pain & you can embrace when you r happy
so when you need true love
spend Rs.50/-Buy a pillow
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Dear Friend,

when I ask you a flower,
you give me bouquet
when I ask you a stone
you give me a statue
when I ask you a feather
you give me peacock

ARE YOU REALLY DEAF ?
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I had VODKA with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had WHISKY with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I had RUM with WATER
I felt DRUNK
I SWEAR I'LL NEVER DRINK water....!!!
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when I call you;
1 ring means I'm thinking of you;
2 ring means I like you;
3 means I miss you;
4 means .........pick the phone idiot
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Teacher : four beautiful ladies are walking on the road. change it to exclamatory sentence ..
Student : WOW !
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The human brain is most outstanding thing.......
it functions 24hrs 365 days.....
it functions right from the time u r Born.... until you fall in love
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SMILE - is a language of love
SMILE - is a source to win hearts...
SMILE - creates greatness in your personality
SO....
Brush your Teeth today onwards
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A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..
A beer shortens your life by 4 min..
A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!..
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History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ?
Student : sir, i am not sure but think from page 15 to 26 sir....
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Teacher : YOU failure ! @ your age Bill gates stood first in the class
Student : Mind you, Sir, but @ your age hitler commited suicide.
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